Today is the world of competition and appreciation. Everybody needs encouragement, and without that, no one is going to enjoy work. Now the term work in this context refers to anything, not just confined to workplace and getting paid.
If a man starts a family he is going to go out for earning. His wife may or may not earn but she is definitely going to do household tasks. If she stays at home and does cooking and cleaning on daily basis as a responsible housewife, she probably is taken for granted by her family members. Everyone knows that she is always available in the house. Therefore, her busy husband would probably give her a number of tasks to search for certain stuffs, prepare and serve him food, do laundry and dishes, and so on. She prepares lunchbox for her husband and kids, drops kids to school, brings them back, and there comes the end of the day where she is exhausted.
She does not complain at all but her husband feels that she simply sits and does nothing, which is a big turn off! She never rests even on holidays or vacations. Vacations are more tiring for her as she is the one who puts stuffs inside the luggage of her spouse and kids. Without her everyone would be helpless but that is only felt when she gets sick or goes to her parents’ house for a few days. For some days her family adjusts but nothing changes when she is back to her regular routine.
There is a drastic increase in the divorce cases. When a woman consults a counselor they often complain about ‘not getting appreciated’ by their spouses that had led them to take this extreme step. I am not talking about alcohol addicts or those who are involved in extra marital affair. I am talking about those who are good men and doing their duty but if they can’t express their emotions their marriage won’t last long, even if they remarry to another women. Marriage works on mutual understanding, dividing roles and responsibilities, and appreciating each other. In many cases, even women forget appreciating their men who go out and work tirelessly.
They also don’t communicate with each other quite often. How would one compliment another if they don’t talk at all? Women like talking and someone who listens to them. If they say they are tired they are not complaining to you. They simply want to express that in words. Just listen to what she says patiently and respond accordingly. Do not give advice or solution.
Men must make a routine to say expressive words to their wife at least once a week like ‘you are such a wonderful cook’, ‘you manage things quite well, don’t you get tired?’, etc. Do something special for her; serve her food, or go for outing. Bring gifts as means of gratitude. This does not ask for consuming lots of time. It requires some extra efforts and that is not a punishment. Everyone wants that their marriage works well, and for that, a person must act mature. Women on the other hand must understand that men are not good at expressing things. They do love you but fail to convey. They are like overgrown kids who need pampering at times. After getting tired they require personal space. So, do not complain right after that. Both the parties do well and without one person another one is incomplete. It is that simple! If things don’t work, talk to one another and try to resolve by yourself, before approaching a counselor or a lawyer!